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What to say to someone who is hurting

My grandmother died this summer, she was Recent Comments Walter Chapman : Great blog! Where is God when it really hurts? She tells me she's depressed and I feel scared or responsible for trying to fix her. Now, I recognize that they were trying in their own little twisted minds to be compassionate somehow, and truly believed that was the cause of my distress, but goodness! It will give your friend some time to grieve or catch up with their life. Medication and therapies take a long time, and I really needed to talk, and wanted only a few people to know about it. Praying for you to have courage to reach out to safe people who wont say silly hurtful things to you, or about your sweet man. One of our online mentors would love to hear about it and journey with you. It validates our suffering. Search Site Menu. As always, I cherish hearing your feedback, your own stories, what part spoke you, or advice on this subject that you want to share with others.

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So I do the opposite. I want to journey this with you. Dearest Jody: You took an important step! Mirna says: November 30, at pm. Carol — I totally hate those platitudes, too. I am going through divorce after 17 years of marriage. What's the next step you feel God is asking you to take?

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Lori : Wow!! Here I was with all these people talking to me and at me. Mirna says: November 30, at pm. Explore Classes. A year! Thanks for sharing. Carol says: April 25, at am. A little empathy goes a long way. Group 4 Created with Sketch. Here are some compassionate responses highlighted in Harris' book:. I gently suggest that his daughter is being selfish. He is the best man I have ever known. I hope you know that I absolutely adore you and love you and this doesn't change that one iota. Take that next step Jody!

What to Say When it Hurts

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  • If the relationship you have with the suffering person includes touching — then hold their hand, hug them while they cry, just be there.

About a month ago I texted my mom to tell her I was having a difficult day. I'm not sure why I did, other than I was having a really tough day emotionally and acted on the impulse to tell someone. Her response made me feel like shit. With a simple "oh well" she discounted the pain I was experiencing and it hurt. She, of course, was just trying to help, to offer a solution or piece of advice in an attempt to make me feel better. After all, I had reached out to tell her how upset I was. How did I expect her to respond? But sometimes, when someone shares what they're going through, they aren't asking for you to make it better. For whatever reason, just telling someone makes us feel a little less desolate. It's human nature to want to share, to have someone who hears us, who understands, who can sympathize with what we're going through. We want to know that we are not alone. We want someone to acknowledge how badly we are hurting, and allow us to be just as we are without needing or expecting us to feel better. We don't want someone to fix our sadness. Think of the last time you shared your pain with someone; how did their response make you feel? Did you feel truly heard, acknowledged and accepted? Or did you feel irritated, disregarded or even hurt, and not fully understand why?

5 Things to Say to Someone Who is Hurting

Listen to this article through Instaread here:. Life is not easy. We all experience pain, disappointment, and loss. One of the great joys of friendship, and the great satisfactions of life, is to be able to comfort a friend or family member in their time of need. Because of the nature of my work I teach communication, and I train health professionals how to comfort patients and families in distress I consider myself a connoisseur of comforting messages. The good ones will take your breath away with their beauty, creativity, and effectiveness.

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What to say to someone who is hurting. What to Say When it Hurts

When someone we care about is hurting, compassionate people like you want to do or say something to help ease their pain. Here are some ways you can offer real comfort — and prevent yourself from making the situation any worse. I never left my son home with a bowl of water on the floor! I never went to bed and left my daughter roaming in the yard! After you make one of the compassionate statements above, either offer a hug or just sit silently with the person. If they want to talk, they hutting. If you feel tears, let them fall. Sit quietly. Just be quiet. Just be present. Mr india images the relationship you have with the suffering person includes touching — then hold their hand, hug them while they cry, just be there. You cannot DO anything to make it better!

Making Sense of Suffering

All of these were church people, several of them on staff. All of them were responding to a situation in which my then 6-year-old son was excluded for the first time. All of them seemed shocked that I would be upset about his exclusion. She was the last person on earth I would have expected God to use that day.

What might they be feeling physically?

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What to Say When it Hurts. Claire Colvin. 0 Comments. Several years ago my friend's son died. His name was Nathan and he was almost two months old when. Aug 16, - When someone we love is hurting, it can be incredibly difficult to know what to say. The circumstance in which they find themselves may trigger. Do you struggle to find the right words when someone shares difficult? that these cliché responses are the best things to say when someone is hurting — even.

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